I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
