This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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