Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
