waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
