great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
