a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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