just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
