I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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