stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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