did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
