I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
