We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize