i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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