Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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