The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
