i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
