Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
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