"it" just moved
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
