do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
