I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
