I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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