btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
did you just send me my own nude
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
