I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
