I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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