I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
