New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
