I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
