Ambien. No doubt about it.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
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Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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