It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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