i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
