So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
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