we have pet lesbian snakes
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
