I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize