it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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