Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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