My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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