If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
