So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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