love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
