I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
