Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
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I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
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I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left