He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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