i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
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