i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
