I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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