there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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