If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
