I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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