this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
