Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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