She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
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Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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